GO AWAY!!!!

No wait! Come back! Oh I'm so glad to see you! I missed you soooooo much! UGH YOU ARE SO ANNOYING! I CAN'T WAIT FOR YOU TO LEAVE! Awww, it's so quiet around here. It sure was nicer when you were here. NOW GO AWAAAAAAAY!

Story of my life.

Artwork by Chaim Soutine c. 1929

They Say You Can't Go Home Again...

But here I am! Back to blogging, that is. It seems that summer has come and gone since I was here last. During that time I have been lucky enough to actually experience a heckuva summer. Caroused around town, traveled to Boston, and Chicago (only a train ride away, so why do I never go?!). My favorite part was having time to get to know my friends better. I paid most of my bills most of the time AND still had time to have fun with a special few. I decided the trade off was well worth it.

So that brings me to the present. Things have slowed down considerably, so it's just me looking back at myself asking, "What's next?" and "Why did I do that?" When I come up with the answers I'll let you know! I've been told that I end up in situations that make it seem like I'm punishing myself. Punishing myself? For what? 

Mandala

I just found out that my father died last month. I guess to me he died in 1982, so it's not really a big loss now. When I first saw his obituary I felt a strange sense of relief which has since become curiosity. Indifference soon to come.

The Giver

I'm a giver. I have recently come to realize that not only do I enjoy doing things for others, but I NEED it. I don't really understand what it means or why I am that way, but I'll go with it. I wonder if other people have feelings like that. It seems like people just go around serving themselves, but I wonder how that affects them at night when they're lying in bed trying to sleep. Maybe it doesn't.

I had a dream a few nights ago that I had a big freckle right in the middle of my face. I looked it up in a dream dictionary which gave this definition: To dream that you have freckles on your face, represents your distinct and unique character. You will stand out in crowd. 
Maybe I'm the last giver out there...

A Storm is a Brewin'

Last night I dreamed that I was in one of the tornadoes that have been hitting the southern part of the United States. I was in a mall, but it was my home- you know how dreams are. For some reason I looked out the door, and I could see the mighty funnel cloud charging toward us. I closed the door and ran for cover, but after two steps I was suddenly floating through the air- like an astronaut.

Why wasn't anyone else floating?! They were still shopping and chatting as people do in a mall. Why am I (and whoever I was with) the only person affected by this tornado? Don't you people know that this is a big deal?!

So after a couple of minutes, my feet were back on the ground. The tornado had gently placed the mall/my home a few blocks away. Most people did not even seem to notice.

Artwork courtesy of Amanda Blake

Hittin' the Road!

This semester of college is finally creeping to its end!
It has been a long, dreary winter and I have been smothered by deadlines and obligations for too long. It may break the bank, but I'm getting out of this place! I need to get back in touch with living. At first, I thought...I'm just going to drive to my old vacation grounds about 6 hours away, sleep in my car, and meander from lake to lake. Well, it has snowballed into a full on weekend getaway- with a hotel room and everything! With gas at $4/gallon, it had better not rain once we get there.

Once I return, I plan on working as much as I can, and putting away as much money as I can. It's not going to be fun. I guess this is what grown ups do. I suppose it could be worse,but hopefully I won't have to find out. This time last year, I was pretty focused on being self-sufficient. I proved to myself that I could do it, so this year let's raise the bar, Amy: be self-sufficient AND have fun. Can it be done?

Lake Minocqua

Breakin' It In!

So who am I? Why would anyone read this? Good question!
I think I will begin by saying that the title of the blog is obviously lifted from the Robert Frost poem, The Road Not Taken. If you are not familiar with it, you should definitely look it over. I've never been great at expression, so I borrow from the minds and mouths of those who are. "I am not a crook!"- R. Nixon

I think that I have emerged from a long line of women who did not take the obvious path- they took the one that "asked for wear." I am the same, yet I am different. I decided at too young of an age that I had seen my mother's stress and anguish age her well beyond her years- I would not let it happen for naught. I would make things different. I would be a success! I would rise from the ashes and, for once, make life easy for my mother. The ebb and flow would not be good enough. Mom deserves better, and so do I. I'm still workin' on it Mom!

Mom & brother c.1988